Originally from 2019

Taking small, quiet steps down the stairs, Kaira made her way from her bedroom to the front door. Her dad had fallen asleep on the couch last night and she was trying her hardest to avoid the ball of anger he became when woke up unexpectedly. 

She made it out of the door safely, making sure to pull it shut as slowly as possible. Cold wind smacked her in the face the moment she stepped outside. She pulled the top of her pink coat up to cover her mouth and nose and fast-walked to the bus stop. It wasn’t far away, but it felt like ages because of the temperature.

Once she was off the bus, the front door of Panda Express was welcoming because it promised a portal to warmth. She opened it up. 

“Good morning, Kaira,” Scott smiled as he watched Kaira walk in through the front door of the Panda Express, hugging her coat closed. 

“Hi, Scott,” she replied, making her way to the kitchen. The scent of orange sauce wafted through the air. 

“Sorry you’re in for a double this weekend, Logan took tonight off, so I had to give his shift to someone,” Scott chuckled as Kaira passed him. 

“And you chose me?” Kaira asked. “Why?”

Scott shrugged. “Dunno, you seem like you can handle it? You were the first person who came to my mind.”

Kaira hung her coat up in the back and tied her apron up before coming back into the kitchen. She put her hair up into a hairnet before putting her hat on top. “Hey, Dotty,” she smiled at the tall woman who was cooking in the kitchen. 

Dotty turned around and waved, anxious to get back to the huge wok full of rice. 

“You know, I’ve never seen you with your hair down,” Scott mentioned. “What’s it look like?”

Kaira adjusted her hat, pushing her netted bun through the hole in the back. “It looks like…hair? I guess…It’s to my waist. I haven’t cut it for years.”

Scott nodded. He got a ping through his headset indicating that someone had pulled up in the drive-thru, and he ran off to answer. Kaira looked at Scott, examining his body curiously. She noticed that he was top-heavy, shoulders wide, arms muscular, but small legs. Like a Dorito. 

“Kaira, can you get me a plate with fried rice, orange chicken, and Beijing beef, please?” he asked as the car pulled up to the window. 

She did as she was told and handed off the styrofoam plate. She had to look up at him, as he nearly towered over her at a whopping 6’3. She hated how much he looked like her dad, but she learned to be okay with it. It was like a nicer version of him that she admired. 

The car in the drive-thru pulled away and Scott leaned against the wall, arms folded. “Honestly, Kaira, do you like working here? You’ve been here way longer than most 16 year olds who’ve worked here. They come for a month then decide they hate it and leave without even giving a two-week notice.”

“Oh, umm, I don’t mind it. I think it’s the free food that keeps me here,” she giggled. “It’s nice to have something to do after school.”

Scott walked slowly towards Kaira, his arms still folded. “But, wouldn’t you rather hang out with friends? A boyfriend, perhaps?”

Kaira laughed. “Oh, god, I don’t have a boyfriend. And my friends are always busy. I really only talk to them in class and stuff.”

“You don’t have a boyfriend..?” Scott asked, tilting his head. 

She shook her head. 

“Oh, that’s a surprise,” Scott stated, taking another step toward her. 

“Hmm, why a surprise?” she asked, taking a step back in return. 

“You’re too pretty not to have a boyfriend,” he laughed. 

Kaira laughed a little, but felt her stomach drop. “Uhh, thank you, I think.”

Scott sighed, still looking at Kaira. “Have you ever had a boyfriend?”

Kaira could feel her hands getting clammy, but she couldn’t tell if it was from discomfort or excitement. “No…I haven’t.”

“No way!” Scott gasped. 

“Yeah, yes way,” she sighed, still keeping a smile. She felt her heart beating a little faster while she stared into Scott’s hazel eyes, hazel just like her dad’s. 

“Wow, that’s totally not what I expected.”

Kaira shrugged. “Yeah… Umm, should I start dishes? There’s a lot piling up over there,” she pointed to the industrial-sized sink that sat awkwardly in the hallway like an elephant. 

“Sure, go ahead,” Scott smiled. He watched Kaira walk to the sink, and she could feel his gaze on her back. She tried to ignore it, but she could feel it the entire time she was washing up. She was too nervous to look back at him, and luckily, just as she was finishing up, a customer walked inside. 

“Hey, Kaira?” Dotty approached Kaira at the sink. Dotty was a decade or two older than Kaira, but her face looked even older. They were almost the same height, plus or minus a few inches. “Are you okay?”

Kaira looked up from the pot she was scrubbing. “Yeah…why?”

“I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation with Scott just now.”

“What about it?”

“Are you okay with him asking you that stuff, girl?” Dotty tilted her head to get a better look at Kaira’s face. 

“I guess. It’s just small talk, right?” Kaira mumbled as she turned the water on to rinse the pot. 

“No, that wasn’t small talk. He was asking you personal stuff. You seemed a little uncomf–”

“Dotty,” Kaira interrupted. “Don’t worry about it, please.”

Dotty frowned and began to turn around to go back into the kitchen. 

“Hey, your dishes are clean now,” Kaira called.  

***

10pm came around, and Kaira was completely exhausted from her twelve-hour shift. She resented Scott for giving her all of these hours, but at least she made a bit of money that day. Her bed at home was calling her name from a few miles away, she just wanted to melt into it. She put her pink jacket back on, clocked out, and walked up the block to the bus stop. Waiting at the bus stop always freaked her out a little, but she knew that if something happened to her, Scott would probably see it from the window and come to her rescue. 

The bus stop closest to her house was only a block away, and she speed-walked all the way there. The streetlights on her street had been out for a month now, and the whole neighborhood wanted to cuss the mayor. 

She unlocked the front door, and inside, she was greeted by two people. Her dad sat on the couch in jeans and a hoodie, a beer in his hand. His other hand was holding a girl’s thigh. The girl was petite, dressed in a V-neck sweater and leather jeans, and she stared at Kaira’s dad lovingly. 

“Dad, really?” Kaira asked after getting a good look at the two. 

He took his hand off of the girl’s thigh. “What the hell is your problem? Have you been at work all this time?”

“You never listen to me! Why can’t you listen to me? I told you I don’t want that bitch in the same house as me!” Kaira felt her body begin to shake as her face grew red. 

“Kaira, get in the fucking kitchen right now,” he demaded, standing up.

The girl gave Kaira a stink face, and Kaira rolled her eyes as she began walking to the kitchen. 

Her dad paced around the kitchen, his hands in his pockets. “Kaira, you do not yell at me or use that language, especially when Olivia is here! You weren’t raised to be a crazy-ass brat!”

“Was I even raised?!” she exclaimed, making sure that Olivia could hear her in the other room. 

Her dad shook his head as he started to leave the kitchen. “Kaira, take your ass upstairs. Now.” 

She started to head for the stairs, trying to keep herself from saying something else, but the urge was too strong. 

“Hope you have fun with your 19 year old girlfriend! A girl who is the same age as my sister!” she yelled back prior to running up the stairs. 

***

At work the following night, Kaira, Dotty, Logan, and Scott were all working together, creating a full house. Kaira hated when there were more than three people there at the same time because the space became so tight, making her feel overwhelmed. She did appreciate the conversations that would come out of everyone, though. So it wasn’t all bad. 

Logan was working the drive thru that night. He was so thin, it looked like he could keel over and die any second. It was confusing to Kaira, as he ate like a monster. She would see him piling food upon food during his break time. Spoonfuls of orange chicken, honey walnut shrimp and mushroom chicken stacked on top, chow mein stuffed on the sides, and a cream cheese rangoon to top it all off. 

He turned and looked at Kaira who was filling an order in the front, trying to scoop rice from the bowl to the plate without it falling everywhere. She hated the “for here” plates, as they were flimsy and made from paper, like from a family barbeque. They got heavy so easily. 

“Kaira,” Logan called. “When you’re done with that can you make a plate for this guy?”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” Kaira replied, trying to focus on not dropping the plate she was holding. The person ordering requested two servings of orange chicken, and Kaira got even more worried that the plate was going to tear. The orange chicken was the heaviest entree, and as she piled it on with her right hand, her left hand and arm began to tremble under the weight. She slowly carried the plate to the cash register, balancing the plate on her hand the best she could. 

“Kaira, can you hurry? This guy’s been waiting awhile,” Logan asked. 

“I’ll just make it,” Scott answered, marching from the freezer towards the food display. He was just about to walk past Kaira, however, because the space between the food display and the stove was so slim, he tried to shuffle sideways behind her. It didn’t work out for him, though. Because he was moving so fast, he ended up bumping into Kaira–his butt against her waist and arm. 

Down Kaira went. She fell backwards and onto the tile floor, her back preparing to be sore for the next week. The food on the plate she was holding made a new home all over her face, neck, and chest. 

“Oh my god, are you okay?” the customer gasped from the other side of the glass. 

None of the other staff realized what had happened until Scott tried to walk back in that direction. He ran his foot into Kaira’s shoulder, flinching in response. 

“Kaira! What happened?” he exclaimed, clearly worried. 

Kaira began to sit up slowly, the food falling from her body onto the floor. “You ran into me, I think, Scott.”

Scott’s eyes widened. “Oh shit, I’m sorry! Are you okay, though?”

The customer was on their tiptoes, trying to get a look at the show. 

Dotty and Logan crowded around Kaira as well, concern in their faces. 

“Yeah, I’m fine, just covered in rice and chicken,” Kaira answered, finally sitting all the way up. 

Scott shooed Logan and Dotty away. “One of you remake this woman’s food, please,” he ordered. 

Kaira began to dust the food off of herself. “I feel disgusting,” she moaned, picking grains of rice off her chest individually. 

“Hey, let’s go in the back. We can get you cleaned up,” Scott offered, putting a hand on the small of Kaira’s back, the other on her arm. 

The two of them walked to the back while Logan and Dotty frantically filled the two orders that were waiting. 

“So, so, so, sorry about that, sweetie. I didn’t mean to do that at all,” Scott explained frantically. He dusted off the remaining grains of rice from her shirt. 

Sweetie? Kaira thought. Why’d he call me sweetie? “Scott, it’s okay, I’m not that hurt, and it was kinda funny.”

He sighed. “Well, your shirt is covered in grease and sauce. Your apron didn’t really help you out this time, did it?”

“I guess not.”

“Hey, I always keep an extra shit in my locker if you want to change into that. It’s a manager’s shirt, but at least you won’t be dirty anymore,” he offered, putting his hand on Kaira’s shoulder. 

Kaira smiled. “Yes, that would be nice.”

Scott retrieved the folded up black polo from his locker, the very top one, and handed it to Kaira. “Here you go!”

“Thank you, Scott. I’ll go change in the bathroom,” Kaira said as she began to walk away from Scott. 

“You can change back here if you want, too,” Scott suggested, putting his hands on his hips. 

Kaira chuckled. “No, no, I’ll go to the bathroom.”

Once she returned from the bathroom, Logan and Dotty both looked at her wide-eyed, instantly realizing that she was wearing Scott’s shirt. It was clearly too big for her, but she didn’t mind. 

Kaira began to make a drive thru order for Logan when Dotty approached her from behind. 

“Scott gave you his shirt?” Dotty asked. 

“No, this is his extra shirt,” Kaira answered. 

Dotty sighed, looking around to make sure Scott wasn’t in listening distance. “Girl, you do realize Scott treats you differently than the rest of us, right?” 

“Haha…no he doesn’t. He’s just nice,” Kaira trailed off, her stomach dropping as he scooped brown rice into a plastic bowl. 

“You’re being sarcastic, yeah?” Dotty replied. 

Kaira smiled and didn’t say anything, making her way to the entrees. 

“Kaira,” Dotty called. 

“Okay, I know he treats me differently, okay. But it’s not a big deal,” she answered, agitated. 

Dotty sighed again. “It is a big deal. He’s like, 40. He shouldn’t be asking you about your dating life and giving you his shirts. Or touching you like–”

“Dotty, please. Just let me have this,” Kaira began to shake in frustration. She grabbed the ladle and topped the rice off with teriyaki chicken strips. 

“Kaira, you need to be careful,” Dotty said, trying her best to make eye contact with Kaira, who was clearly avoiding it. “Why would you want this kind of attention, anyway? It can go south very quickly.”

Kaira shut her eyes, trying to calm herself down for a moment. 

“Kaira, would you hurry up with the bowl, please?” Logan called, causing her to flinch. 

“It’s almost done, Logan,” she called back. 

Dotty folded her arms, waiting for Kaira to answer.

“Fine,” she exhaled, pouring teriyaki sauce over the chicken. “He just…it makes me feel special, okay?”

“Kaira, seriously. Be careful. This isn’t a good thing to pursue,” Dotty stated sternly. 

Kaira put a lid on the top of the bowl and started walking towards Logan. “Dotty, please leave it alone.” 

***

“Oh, Scott, before I leave,” Kaira started, putting her time card into the clock. It was a little after 10 and Kaira was dying to go to bed. “Do you want the shirt back now?”

He shook his head. “You can bring it back tomorrow. I don’t mind.”

Kaira smiled. “Thank you Scott. For helping me tonight.”

“Just doin’ my job,” he chuckled. 

Kaira put her key into the front door, taking a deep breath. She could see her breath in front of her. I swear, if Olivia is in this house…

“Hey,” Kaira’s dad greeted her, manspreading on the couch, a can of Pepsi in his hand. “Olivia’s not here. You happy now?”

Kaira closed and locked the door behind her, unzipping her coat. “No. I’m not happy.”

Her dad took a deep sigh, closing his legs and sitting up. “Why are you so difficult to please?”

“Because you’re dating a girl the same age as my sister. Your own daughter. Don’t you think that’s gross? Because, uhh, I do,” Kaira asked, folding her arms. 

“It doesn’t matter, Kaira. You don’t get it. Adults can date other adults. It’s allowed,” he replied harshly. 

“That doesn’t mean it’s not gross. You’re dating a girl who’s three years older than me! The age gap is like, 30 something years!” Kaira exclaimed. 

“Age is just a num–”

“No, Dad! It isn’t! Especially when she could be your daughter!” Kaira interrupted.

Her dad sighed. “Why do you care so much, kid?”

“Why do I care?” Kaira repeated. She put her head down for a moment, shutting her eyes. “Because it feels like you’re replacing me and my sister. And it especially feels like you’re replacing Mom.” Her voice began to get shaky as she held back tears. 

“Kaira, no, I’m not replacing anyone,” he whined. 

“Then why don’t you spend time with me anymore? Why do you never make time for you and I to do something together? Why are you always with Olivia?” Kaira couldn’t hold back her tears anymore, and her cheeks glistened with water. 

“Kaira, I–”

“I don’t wanna hear it, Dad, I don’t. I’m going to bed,” she interrupted, stomping towards the stairs. 

Her dad didn’t say anything else. 

In the morning before school, Kaira came downstairs dressed in Scott’s shirt and a pair of pink pajama pants. She dragged herself into the kitchen, eyes half-closed, when she was greeted by her dad sitting at the table, mug in hand. 

“Huh? Why are you awake?” she asked, rubbing her eyes. 

He pointed to the stove. “I made potatoes and eggs.” 

“Why?” She approached the stove, grabbing a couple of potato wedges with her hands. 

“I thought about something last night,” he started, tracing the rim of his mug with his pinky finger. 

Kaira raised her eyebrows and she chewed. 

“I’m leaving Olivia.”

“What? Why? I thought you liked her,” Kaira spoke with her mouth full of food. 

He shook his head. “I care more about you than I care about her. You’re my daughter.”

Kaira folded her arms, swallowing. “You sure don’t act like it,” she barked. 

“Exactly. Do you work today after school? We could get ice cream together,” he suggested, trying to force a smile.

“I do have work. And it’s too cold for ice cream,” Kaira replied, unfolding her arms before grabbing a handful of scrambled eggs straight out of the skillet. 

“Kaira, is this what you want?” he asked her. 

Kaira rolled her eyes. She knew she should be happy, but his words felt like nothing. “It seems forced. Is this what you want?”

“Yes, this is what I want,” he began. “It’s just not so easy.”

Kaira nodded, sucking eggs out of her palm. 

“Do you want one of my t-shirts? That way you don’t have to sleep in your uniform. I just want to do something nice,” he sighed. 

“Oh, this isn’t my uniform,” Kaira smirked. “It’s my manager’s.”

Her dad tilted his head. “Why are you wearing your manager’s shirt?”

  “He’s nice to me,” she answered sarcastically. 

“Is he your age?” he asked. 

Kaira shook her head. “No, he’s a little younger than you, I think.”

“And he gave you his shirt?” 

Kaira nodded. 

***

“Hey, Scott, here’s your shirt,” Kaira smiled, approaching Scott in the back. He was searching for a mop. 

“Oh, thank you, Kaira. Can you put it in my locker for me? I’m kind of preoccupied right now,” he chuckled, looking back at her. 

Kaira stood up on her tiptoes, trying to reach the very top locker. Her fingertips could barely even grace the bottom of it. “Scott, I’m too short for your locker,” she laughed. She stayed in that position so that Scott could see just how short she was for laughs. 

Scott turned around putting his mop down for a moment. “Oh, you are! I can help you out,” he smiled. He approached Kaira from behind, grabbing her by the upper waist. “Okay, I’m gonna lift you up, 3, 2, 1!” 

Kaira squealed as Scott held her up, her feet dangling. She was able to open up the locker and throw in Scott’s shirt. “I got it!” she laughed. Her heart began to flutter as her smile grew. 

Scott let her down slowly so as to not drop her. “So glad I’m not short!” he laughed. 

Kaira turned around to face Scott. “Can I tell you something?” she asked. 

His laughter died down as he bent his knees a little bit to get to Kaira’s level. “Yeah, what’s up?”

“I just wanted to say thank you again,” she started. “I’m always happy to come into work when you’re here. You treat me so nicely and it means a lot to me.” The words came out of her mouth like melted butter, smooth and slow. Her hands were getting clammy, and she could feel her face getting hot. 

Scott smiled. “Of course, Kaira! You’re such a great employee. Between you and me, you’re my favorite.”

Kaira chuckled. “Am I?”

“Yes, you are,” Scott answered. 

Kaira continued giggling, not knowing what to say. In that moment, she felt herself filling up with happiness. That was just what she needed to hear. 

Scott stared at her, admiring her laugh. “Oh, Kaira,” he sighed. Still bending down to her height, he put one of his hands on Kaira’s shoulder and the other on her jaw. She stopped laughing and looked at him, completely dumbfounded. The room started spinning as he brought his face closer to hers. 

She didn’t know what to do. Her heart was beating out of her chest, her hands drenched with sweat, and her mind racing. Is this what I want? she thought to herself. She couldn’t bring herself to say anything, as the situation was overwhelming to the point of speechlessness. Her shoulders began to shake as her arms hung by her sides. 

Scott’s lips made contact with Kaira’s, but Kaira didn’t kiss him back. She froze up completely, the room spinning even faster now. She didn’t close her eyes, she just stared off at the freezer. This will be over in a second, she thought, trying to calm herself down. 

Scott moved his hand from her shoulder to her back, and her stomach began to twist and turn, brewing up a fresh batch of vomit that she had to repress. He wouldn’t take his lips off of hers, and Kaira thought she was going to die. 

Dotty left the kitchen to get a bag of frozen beef. She walked with haste, hoping to get back to her stove before she burned the chow mein. She went to open the freezer and stopped to do a double take as soon as she saw what was going on in her peripheral. She made eye contact with Kaira and knew she had to do something.

“Scott, what on EARTH are you going?” she yelled, storming in their direction. 

Scott pulled back as quickly as he could, leaving speechless Kaira against the lockers. He opened his mouth to say something, but Dotty wouldn’t let him speak. 

“I’m telling HR! You weirdo!” she shouted. 

“Dotty, please don’t tell anyone, please. It wasn’t what it looked like,” Scott pleaded, trying to be quiet. 

“Scott, it doesn’t matter what it ‘looked’ like,” Dotty started, “You kissed your 16 year old employee. I’m telling HR.” She began to walk away towards the kitchen, and Scott followed her, his steps frantic. 

“Dotty, please. I can’t lose this job,” he cried. 

Kaira stood there against the lockers, still shaking. She was alone now, and she had some time to process what had happened. But she couldn’t. The moment replayed in her head over and over like a GIF. She could hear Scott and Dotty arguing in the kitchen, very muted, but she couldn’t try and eavesdrop. Her mind couldn’t handle it. 

On autopilot, Kaira began to walk into the kitchen. Scott and Dotty’s voices got louder with every step, but not a single word registered in her head. It was like she was hearing them talk from underwater. 

“Kaira, you need to write a report for HR,” Dotty told her sternly, watching her drag her feet on the red tile. 

“Kaira, you know it was nothing! You don’t have to do anything!” Scott cried, desperately trying to get Kaira to look at him. 

Kaira, without looking up, turned out of the kitchen and headed to the front door, her strides small and slow. 

“Where are you going?” Dotty yelled. 

“Home,” she answered, walking outside without her coat.